There once was a bunch of tiny frogs, who arranged a running competition.
Their goal was to reach the top of a very high tower. A big crowd had gathered around the tower to see the race and cheer on the contestants.
The race began. Honestly, no one in the crowd really believed that the tiny frogs would reach the top of the tower. You heard statements such as "Oh, WAY too difficult!" "They will NEVER make it to the top." In addition, they heard, "Not a chance that they will succeed. The tower is too high!"
The tiny frogs began collapsing, one by one. Except for those, who in a fresh tempo were climbing higher and higher. The crowd continued to yell, "It is too difficult! No one will make it!"
More tiny frogs got tired and gave up. However, ONE continued higher and higher and higher, this one would not give up!
At the end, everyone else had given up climbing the tower. Except for the one tiny frog that after a big effort was the only one who reached the top! THEN all of the other tiny frogs naturally wanted to know how this one frog managed to do it? A contestant asked the tiny frog how the one who succeeded had found the strength to reach the goal.
It turned out... that the winner was DEAF!
The wisdom of this story is NEVER listening to other people's tendencies to be negative or pessimistic because they take your most wonderful dreams and wishes away from you...the ones you have in your heart!
Always think of the power words have. Because everything you hear and read will affect your actions!
Therefore, ALWAYS be POSITIVE! Above all, be DEAF when people tell YOU that YOU cannot fulfill YOUR dreams! People are going to tell you... YOU WILL NEVER GET OUT OF DEBT...IT'S HOPELESS! You may already be TELLING YOURSELF that there is no way out.
Always think, I can do this!
Remember this Lesson:
Life is like a horse that throws you. Successes just get back up and try it again. Failures whine about being thrown.
Money and Self-Control: The Battle Between Thoughts and Emotions
Spend now or save for tomorrow? Many financial decisions come down to this exact problem. If you buy the dress or the sunglasses now, you can't use that money at the weekend to pay for the restaurant. How do we calculate these kind of trade-offs? Do we make any calculation at all? If not, then what factors influence our decisions?
There are two sets of answers to the question of how we decide whether to spend or save, hoard or splurge. In the first set of answers humans are seen as rational, logical creatures who make decisions about money by carefully weighing up the present against the future. People try to balance how useful it is to spend the money now, compared to how useful it will be to spend the money later.
And for the phrase 'how useful' you can substitute, say: 'how happy it makes you/someone else' or 'the financial advantage you would gain'. It's all about trade-offs in current emotional, financial or other states in the moment compared to how you imagine the future.
This view of people exercising the wisdom of Solomon is dying fast.This view of people exercising the wisdom of Solomon is dying fast. This is simply because it doesn't fully explain how people actually behave. Nowadays amongst researchers there's much less emphasis on people calculating usefulness - either in the moment or future usefulness - and more on how our self-control and emotions interact at the actual moment of decision-making (Camerer, Loewenstein & Prelec, 2005).
Reason versus emotion
New perspectives on how our self-control interacts with our spending see a battle between impulsive, emotional processes and far-sighted planning processes. One part of us is saying: "Buy it, you'll feel real good!" and another part is saying: "No, we need that money to pay the rent!"
Findings from this type of research are only just starting to emerge, but here are some fascinating highlights on how our self-control works:
Increased cognitive load decreases self-control. This is something marketers are well-aware of: distracted people are more likely to spend money. Most shops are filled with shiny, complicated distractions - bright colours, music and 'incredible offers' - designed to confuse us and open our wallets.
Our supply of self-control is limited. Studies show that our self-control is actually sapped each time we use it (Baumeister & Vohs, 2003). It's also sapped, predictably, by alcohol, lack of sleep and stress.
And how our self-control is affected by our emotions:
Sadness makes us want a change (any change). Sadness may well increase the chance we want to spend. One study found that those who are sad are more likely to want to sell at a lower price and buy at a higher price (Lerner, Small & Loewenstein, 2004).
Disgust makes us want to get rid of everything. When we're disgusted we want to get rid of the things we have and don't want to buy anything.
Anxiety makes us want to reduce uncertainty. Anxiety makes us prefer low-risk options (Raghunathan & Pham, 1999).
How to make better decisions with money
At this stage relatively little is known about how our monetary self-control and our emotions interact. Nevertheless there's already some clear practical messages about how to make better decisions about money from these results:
Self-imposed limits. Research by Professor Dan Ariely (reported in his book Predicatably Irrational) suggests that self-imposed limits can help to increase self-control. Telling other people about these limits will tend to increase our adherence to them. Professor Ariely even suggests a special credit card which only lets you spend money on certain categories of goods (e.g. groceries) up to a certain pre-set limit, then it warns of overspending. Unsurprisingly credit card companies haven't taken up the idea, good though it is.
Cooling-off periods. Take time to decide about a purchase, especially anything expensive. Not just a few minutes - more like a few hours or days. Many people already do this and it's an extremely effective method of financial decision-making. Emotional states are likely to affect our self-control in all kinds of complicated ways. Sadness may make us more likely to spend, anxiety can make us avoid risks (perhaps risks we should take). Plus our emotions probably have many other effects which remain a mystery.
Monitor your self-control. The fact that self-control seems to run-down with use suggests we need to monitor its levels. Have you used a lot of self-control recently? Are you tired? Are you about to snap? Again, it might be better to wait until your self-control tank is refilled.
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